Rebound Relationship – What are the Meaning and Implications?

A rebound relationship spells doom for both partners. For those coming in contact with the term for the first time, a rebound relationship is not something new, but something almost everyone has done before. I will explain it in detail:

What is a Rebound Relationship?

You just left a relationship with all its pains and hurt. You have yet to heal from the breakup. Then, you meet someone interested in you. You did not wait to hear what they would say; you have jumped into the relationship train, and you are all over each other and in love.

This is what a rebound relationship entails. The problem with this kind of relationship is that the ‘rebounded’ or your new lover will find it difficult to keep up with you. You are going to act out all your frustrations on them. It does not matter the length of time the breakup has lasted.

The major implication in a rebound relationship is that you may have chosen someone who is not your spec when it comes to a partner, but because you cannot deal with the pain of the past alone, you cling to them. Then, you cause them untold pain and you do not even care because you expect them to understand that you are in pain. 

This is why you must heal from your previous breakup, understand what made you separate, what you need in a partner, and when to give love another chance. 

Recent studies show that individuals with an avoidant attachment style are typically more likely to engage in rebound relationships following breakup distress.

It is not enough to leave a toxic relationship. It is not enough to consider your age, which is going up. 

It is not enough that you spent some unproductive years with your ex. As long as you have not healed properly, don’t cause pain in the life of another person.

Before entering a new relationship, ensure you have charted the course, and understood what your new partner needs and what you need. Do both of you find yourselves on the same pedestal? Do you think they are what you want? If you are unsure of what you need from a life partner, check our previous post on ‘How to Attract Your Dream Lady or Guy.’ It is a very detailed topic.

How to Know You Are in a Rebound Relationship

To understand the person rebounding with you or, probably, you are the one rebounding, the following will help you.

You do not know much about yourself

If the only thing you can confidently tell your new partner is stories of your past relationship, you cannot even remember your hobbies or interesting things about yourself again, you may be rebounding.

You find it difficult to reflect on the past

If it is difficult to sit down and reflect on the previous relationship and you are not ready to accept the reality, odds are that you are rebounding. Going into another relationship may be catastrophic; you may not be able to keep it.

Your ex is always at the center of your talks

If you always have something to say about your ex, even when it is obvious the new person in your life is not happy, you may still be emotionally connected to your ex. It will be unfair to your new partner to bear the brunt of your past.

Do you want to know why men cheat? Or, would you rather find out the reasons women cheat?

You keep comparing your new partner with the old one

If you keep comparing your new partner with your ex, chances are that you still love your ex and have not come over the relationship. Whether you see your new partner as better or worse than your ex, it is not right to compare both. 

This is different from saying something about them once in a while. But when you cannot make a few sentences without referring to your ex, it is a sign that you have not healed completely. You are in a rebound relationship. The comparison could also be a reason your relationship failed.

You do not want to talk about your ex

Here, if you deliberately refuse to talk about your ex or you discover that you resent them or feel a tinge of hurt whenever the topic is brought up, it is a sign that you are still rebounding. You still need healing.

You find it difficult to open up

If you find it difficult to open up and explore your new relationship, you may not be far from rebounding. You refuse to be vulnerable and yield to your new partner. You are not yourself around them, even though you are together. You are not ready to let your new lover into your core. All these are signs that you are rebounding.

You want to show your new partner off as quickly as possible

You know in that situation where you go about social media, painting everywhere colorful with your new lover, trying to let your ex find out that you have met someone better than them? Chances are you are still healing from the previous relationship. I understand that people like showing off their new catch, but when you are doing it to make your ex feel jealous, you are in a rebound relationship.

If you only want sex in the relationship

If your past relationship was a sexually active one, chances are you only want a new one for the sake of sex. This is exceptional if both of you have agreed on what you want, and sex is one of the requirements.

You are always having a mixed feeling

If you are struggling to get distracted from your ex and at the same time, trying to be emotionally involved with your present partner, you may be in a rebound relationship. People who are still struggling to quit the previous relationship always send mixed signals to their partner. This can be very frustrating because they are emotionally divided.

The relationship moves so fast, but you have yet to get hold of any true connection

Before you know it, you and your new partner are in a seriously undefined relationship. You profess to love, move in with them, and are doing anything possible to get connected. However, the connection feels abnormal and empty. Furthermore, you discover that you do not have much in common.

From our narrations, you can see that rebounding is very dangerous to your relationship life. Take your time to heal properly before committing to another relationship. Never put another person into the pain of putting up with you, all because they choose you as their partner. One peculiar reason for being in a rebound relationship is that you do not want to feel the pain of the breakup. But I tell you, the pain helps you to reason well again. Go through the normal process, and by the end of the exercise, you will be glad you did. Don’t be a pain in someone else’s bum.

Read also: how to negotiate your way into a beautiful relationship

What to do to avoid entering a rebound relationship

I want you to help me do the following before falling in love again.

• Deal with your loss, loneliness, and desperation. It is not out of place to be desperate for love again. Just take it slowly and deal with yourself. Be honest with yourself, no matter how hurtful it may seem. If you go into a new relationship with all the hurt, you may pick someone with a conflicting interest.
• Do not run from your past. Deal with everything that has to do with your past before committing to a new relationship. When you are with a new partner, you are meant to focus on them and not have divided attention between him and an ex who has moved on.
• Rummage on what went wrong in the previous relationship. Going through that path might be very painful, but it is inevitable. Go through it and discover the things that are not right about it. Check out the way you behaved, things you did that were not right, the way your ex behaved towards you that was not right, and so on. When you have done so, it will help you understand what to do and what to avoid in your new relationship. Not only that; it will guide you in the kind of choice to make in your new relationship.
• Do away with your ex. Someone said that ‘ex’ means ‘expired’. That exactly is what your ex means. They have expired in your life. You could keep them as casual friends later on in life, but as the healing process is going on, shove them out of your thoughts and let them expire in peace. You can block them on all your social media platforms until you can deal with their presence again without the pain or love resurfacing.

If you are a lady, learn these powerful secrets of keeping a man

• Let love rule. Keep being phenomenal. Don’t worry; even if you are forty, God always has someone for you. Just do the right thing and let God take over the rest. Enjoy your time with yourself. Do not forget self-love. You need doses of it. Have fun, sweetheart.

I hope you enjoyed a great read about the rebound relationship. Leave a comment and share it with others.